Stopping the Smoke Signals...

QuitMeter Counter courtesy of www.quitmeter.com.



I've done it again, some people weren't really sure if I had picked it up again...but I had.. I was smoking... back to 15 cigarettes a day (that's only 5 short of a whole pack for all who don't know) I'm officially 24 hours into being a non-smoker again... and this time feels different than all the other times I had tried to quit. I didn't spend the whole day thinking about smoking...I'm sure visions of cigarettes dancing around like sugar plumb fairies is about to start...but the prevailing thought is the one I had last week during my lesson... the one where I was kicking myself for ever having smoked my first cig. There are others too... like the shocked look I often used to get when new acquaintances would find out that I too was a member of the nicotine buying public.


Bottom line is I was getting deceitful, I would not smoke on days that I dance so that I wouldn't have to hear about it from my instructor. If I was meeting up with family I'd strategically plan times so I could make sure I got a shower and fresh clothes on before we'd meet up. And my car... my poor nice car... ashes all over the sides of it from flicking out the window... blue haze over the windshield from all the smoke, that's just gross. I figure if you can't be proud of what you're doing and you have to hide it from people then you shouldn't be doing it. So I'm not going to do it... anymore...

Statistically, quitting smoking is harder than quitting cocaine, crack, speed, or nearly any other major illegal narcotic out there... but I'm determined to beat this... and I'm not going to put weight back on while I'm doing it either. I've got my chewing gum and my carrot sticks at the ready... so yeah cold turkey it is... I've tried the patch...it itches something terrible... the nicotine gum is gross... the last time I quit successfully (for about a year until I turned 21 and hit the bar scene) I did it with gum and carrots... so gum and carrots it is... and since you can't smoke in nearly any bar anymore I'm feeling pretty safe there... I'm holding myself accountable and that handy dandy little counter up there is going to help me stay motivated... I promise on my favorite pair of dance shoes that I'll re-set it if I lapse...

Wish me luck!